(no subject)

[windemere]

Lately, I've had a string of friends getting engaged, married or having babies (one, in fact, is on pregnancy #2). I've always had very little interest in that being my life (married with kids in my twenties), but right now it is just very hard not to look at them and think that maybe that could have been what happened, if I had been obsessed with academia. And then I start to wonder if I'll ever have anything in my life other than academia (I don't want kids either way, but a husband and stable home would be nice).

Just...going around in circles. I hate being jealous of people when I don't really want what they have. It'sa very frustrating feeling.

Meanwhile, the weather today is the worst since April. I have decided not to go outside. Everything can wait until tomorrow and I have about six books to get through and a report to fix.

Comments

[zaftig46.livejournal.com]

It's all to easy to question our choices. But I can guarantee to you that at least some of your friends on the other side are jealous of your being able to move to another country and pursue your academic dreams. Neither one is better or worse, they are choices you have made for a reason. Jealousy is unproductive, but it does sometimes serve to remind us that our choices are right for us.

[eldanna.livejournal.com]

Look at you, words of wisdom! Is that what a (near) doctorate gets you? Instant knowledge of life? I hope so...:D

[zaftig46.livejournal.com]

Hah, maybe three-something years of questioning my choices got me some wisdom after all!

[eldanna.livejournal.com]

Sounds like it worked! When's the Viva? If it's tomorrow, and I've forgotten then GOOD LUCK (not that you need it). If not tomorrow then I hope to see you before hand.