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The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, Special Extended Edition
I have one word: ::speechless::
But here's a lot of talking anyways. You don't want them, but you're going to get them. (ROTK conversation between Kate and me while watching the EE...the first time around).
1) Gandalf: "He will raze Minas Tirith to the ground!"
Kate: I had to explain 'raze' to someone. That it meant 'burn'. Though how you burn a stone city...I suppose you could burn it to lime and chalk and then it would erod. But that would take awhile.
2) (When Gandalf and Pippin first enter the citadel in Minas Tirith)
Amy: Those are Corinthian columns. And those are Doric.
Kate: And that's a clerestory.
A: It's like early basilica....Let's stop this converstation.
3) Gandalf: "The board is set, the peices are moving."
A: And that means there's chess in Middle-earth!
4) (Of the lighting of the beacons)
K: Their hut is smaller than the torch. They should hallow out the torch and burn the hut. Except the hut is made of stone.
5) (Of Merry when he rides out from Edoras with the army)
K: Well, now we know why he's so happy the horse is moving.
6) (Of Legolas after the drinking game)
K: You know, he's drunk for the rest of the movie.
7) (In response to Eomer telling Eowyn war was not for women)
K: Bastard.
8) (After Aragorn exits the Paths of the Dead, thinking he failed)
K: Right now he's thinking: "Why does Elrond always have to be right? Half-right."
9) (Of the rain of skulls)
K: That one was trephinated.
10) (Of the King of the Dead)
K: Let's call him Jeff. (After Geoffrey Rush in Pirates)
11) (After they exit the Paths of the Dead and Legolas is comforting Aragorn.
A: Okay, THAT was a slash moment.
12) (Of the rain of skulls)
A: This is a story to tell the grandchildren.
AND
13) (Of the look on Aragorn's face)
K: Oh, no, not another rain of skulls. How many times can this happen to a person?
14) (On how Legolas knows Aragorn is leaving the Rohirrim)
A: You know how Legolas knew Aragorn was leaving? Elrond came and ordered him to follow Estel.
K: Since Legolas doesn't sleep he was alerted to Elrond's presense by his ESP (Elven Sensory Perception). So he wakes Gimli; they pack; he gets the horse, while Gimli stakes out the road; and then they jump him on his way out.
15) (On Eowyn in battle)
K: Not. Fit. For. War. My. Ass.
16) (On Eowyn's directions to Merry during the Oliphant scene)
K: Go left! Other left!
17) (On the Pelegir scene when the Dead show up)
K: Look, there's Jeff!
18) (On the Orcs when they find Frodo poisoned by Shelob)
K: They prefer the term "exposition work".
19) (On the Winding Stair)
K: If I couldn't build a better staircase than that, I would take up turnip farmering. You know, that might actually mean 'sleeping with the turnip farmer'.
20) (On the difference between the Winding Stair and the bridge to Minas Morgul)
A: I'd rather take the straight road to Hell, than the winding, steep one.
21) (On Frodo's vision of Galadriel)
K: It was a good scene for an hilusionation.
22) (When Denethor is about to burn himself)
K: Look! Coiffers! (Only AR215 students will truely get this)
23) (When the Witch-King sets his sword on fire)
A: That's a neat trick.
24) (On the Orc commander who rides to battle on his warg...the only one in the entire army)
K: Who parks a warg in the middle of an army?
25) (On the catapults)
A: When there's 200,000 orcs out there...
A/K: You're bound to hit something.
26) (When the Rohirrim show up unexpectantly on the Pelennor)
A: I like how he has to tell them what 'form ranks' means.
K: They're orcs.
27) (On Denethor's death run)
K: The longest sprint in the history of ME. The longest flaming sprint in the history of the universe.
28) (When Legolas seems to fire two arrows during the Pelennor battle...but there are no arrows)
K: He's so good he can kill them without arrows. The air released from his bowstring is toxic. Not like a fart; like the blast that proceeds a nuclear explosion.
29) (After the Faramir/Eowyn scene in HH)
K: OMG. My life is now complete.
30) (On the meeting of the commanders in the throne room before the march to the Black Gates)
K: See? When did Gandalf become Mr. Doubtsalot?
31) (On the Palantir)
K: How Sauron says 'Bite Me'.
32) (On the Black Gates scene)
K: Never knock on Death's door and run away. Death really hates that.
33) A: That's Earendil's star! OMG. That's better than Aeneas!
And lastly:
K: The 'Extended Version'. Or, 'when Peter Jackson fanwanks himself for 50 minutes'.
Aren't you glad you read all that? ::grins::
On a point of complaint: Puting scenes in trailers and then not having them in the movie should be a punishable offense.
~Amy
Note for me: K: It was more of an orc assisted suicide.
But here's a lot of talking anyways. You don't want them, but you're going to get them. (ROTK conversation between Kate and me while watching the EE...the first time around).
1) Gandalf: "He will raze Minas Tirith to the ground!"
Kate: I had to explain 'raze' to someone. That it meant 'burn'. Though how you burn a stone city...I suppose you could burn it to lime and chalk and then it would erod. But that would take awhile.
2) (When Gandalf and Pippin first enter the citadel in Minas Tirith)
Amy: Those are Corinthian columns. And those are Doric.
Kate: And that's a clerestory.
A: It's like early basilica....Let's stop this converstation.
3) Gandalf: "The board is set, the peices are moving."
A: And that means there's chess in Middle-earth!
4) (Of the lighting of the beacons)
K: Their hut is smaller than the torch. They should hallow out the torch and burn the hut. Except the hut is made of stone.
5) (Of Merry when he rides out from Edoras with the army)
K: Well, now we know why he's so happy the horse is moving.
6) (Of Legolas after the drinking game)
K: You know, he's drunk for the rest of the movie.
7) (In response to Eomer telling Eowyn war was not for women)
K: Bastard.
8) (After Aragorn exits the Paths of the Dead, thinking he failed)
K: Right now he's thinking: "Why does Elrond always have to be right? Half-right."
9) (Of the rain of skulls)
K: That one was trephinated.
10) (Of the King of the Dead)
K: Let's call him Jeff. (After Geoffrey Rush in Pirates)
11) (After they exit the Paths of the Dead and Legolas is comforting Aragorn.
A: Okay, THAT was a slash moment.
12) (Of the rain of skulls)
A: This is a story to tell the grandchildren.
AND
13) (Of the look on Aragorn's face)
K: Oh, no, not another rain of skulls. How many times can this happen to a person?
14) (On how Legolas knows Aragorn is leaving the Rohirrim)
A: You know how Legolas knew Aragorn was leaving? Elrond came and ordered him to follow Estel.
K: Since Legolas doesn't sleep he was alerted to Elrond's presense by his ESP (Elven Sensory Perception). So he wakes Gimli; they pack; he gets the horse, while Gimli stakes out the road; and then they jump him on his way out.
15) (On Eowyn in battle)
K: Not. Fit. For. War. My. Ass.
16) (On Eowyn's directions to Merry during the Oliphant scene)
K: Go left! Other left!
17) (On the Pelegir scene when the Dead show up)
K: Look, there's Jeff!
18) (On the Orcs when they find Frodo poisoned by Shelob)
K: They prefer the term "exposition work".
19) (On the Winding Stair)
K: If I couldn't build a better staircase than that, I would take up turnip farmering. You know, that might actually mean 'sleeping with the turnip farmer'.
20) (On the difference between the Winding Stair and the bridge to Minas Morgul)
A: I'd rather take the straight road to Hell, than the winding, steep one.
21) (On Frodo's vision of Galadriel)
K: It was a good scene for an hilusionation.
22) (When Denethor is about to burn himself)
K: Look! Coiffers! (Only AR215 students will truely get this)
23) (When the Witch-King sets his sword on fire)
A: That's a neat trick.
24) (On the Orc commander who rides to battle on his warg...the only one in the entire army)
K: Who parks a warg in the middle of an army?
25) (On the catapults)
A: When there's 200,000 orcs out there...
A/K: You're bound to hit something.
26) (When the Rohirrim show up unexpectantly on the Pelennor)
A: I like how he has to tell them what 'form ranks' means.
K: They're orcs.
27) (On Denethor's death run)
K: The longest sprint in the history of ME. The longest flaming sprint in the history of the universe.
28) (When Legolas seems to fire two arrows during the Pelennor battle...but there are no arrows)
K: He's so good he can kill them without arrows. The air released from his bowstring is toxic. Not like a fart; like the blast that proceeds a nuclear explosion.
29) (After the Faramir/Eowyn scene in HH)
K: OMG. My life is now complete.
30) (On the meeting of the commanders in the throne room before the march to the Black Gates)
K: See? When did Gandalf become Mr. Doubtsalot?
31) (On the Palantir)
K: How Sauron says 'Bite Me'.
32) (On the Black Gates scene)
K: Never knock on Death's door and run away. Death really hates that.
33) A: That's Earendil's star! OMG. That's better than Aeneas!
And lastly:
K: The 'Extended Version'. Or, 'when Peter Jackson fanwanks himself for 50 minutes'.
Aren't you glad you read all that? ::grins::
On a point of complaint: Puting scenes in trailers and then not having them in the movie should be a punishable offense.
~Amy
Note for me: K: It was more of an orc assisted suicide.
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K: If I couldn't build a better staircase than that, I would take up turnip farmering. You know, that might actually mean 'sleeping with the turnip farmer'.
I so remember saying that!
Actually, I sort of remember saying them all.
We will never remember the Great Fanwank of That Evening. It's our curse.
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